My Life is a Magazine

Alas and alack I'm all out of whack!

My body is now "National Geographic"

All thanks to gravity

But my mind is "Mental Floss"

And my vision is "Optometrist Monthly"

My house is due any day for a "Clean Sweep"

And "Martha" would go into shock

If on my cluttered house's door

She should decide to knock.

I love "Crafts" and "Scrapbooking, etc"

And that's why my study is such a mess

And here I am on the "PC"

While my sins I confess.

"People" would suggest "Better Homes and Gardens"

Might be the "O"nly way to go

But my secret pack rat life

Only the "Enquirer" knows... Thena "